Feisty Thoughts: What Having A Child Taught Me About Burlesque

As I sit here on my 5.5 hour flight heading to Boston for the Great Burlesque Exposition, I am left with plenty of time to reflect on the past and present, while looking into the future.

One of the most life changing things that has happened to me was having my daughter. Now this isn’t going to be a post about ohmawgawd my baby made a cute sound and I’m forever in awe of her cuteness. Although I could write a book on my mommy faux pas, not everyone has the ovary twitch of babies. Instead, my daughter has helped me learn and continue to learn important life lessons that have in turn helped me become a better performer and ultimately a better person.

Lesson 1 – Patience/Jealousy
I put these two together because for me, they go hand in hand. For a long time, I would consider jealousy a normal part of my being. I was jealous over opportunities given to advance, opportunities that others were able to take, because their life allowed them that path, and of others natural abilities. Sometimes it gave me drive, but mostly it ate at my soul and made me a very ugly person which ultimately shows.

There were countless things that kept me stagnic, work, school, pregnancy, but what I realized was that my jealousy stemmed from my impatience to get to my goals fast. This makes for a very unenjoyable ride and at one point had me considering leaving burlesque completely.

When I had my daughter, I had to learn to be on somebody else’s schedule. I had to put another humans life above my own, which for as many big personalities that populate the burlesque scene, we all can understand that it was a difficult transition to make. She taught me that as cliche as it sounds, stolen straight from the realms of pinterest, it wasn’t about the destination, but about the journey. Which leads me to my second lesson…

Lesson Two- Enjoy the Small Moments
Progressing in any art form takes skill and dedication. No one can progress if they don’t take inventory of the small victories conquered. Have you made it a point to take classes and evolve your skill set? Then take a moment to be proud of yourself for that act that looked and felt amazing. Have you been making an effort to expand your costumes and make them a spectacle worth viewing? Then whole heartedly accept someone’s compliments on your work.

My daughter is only mine for a short while. Even in the maddening frenzy before a show, I’ve learned to enjoy her sweet moments and let life unfold as it does. In the end, its all about enjoying the life you create.

Lesson Three- Improvise
Shit goes wrong… Often. We never have enough practices before a big reveal. There are always going to be improvements that could be made. Just go with the flow and have a back up plan, or at least back up moves that you could throw into a routine.

I feel like shit going wrong with a child does not need much explanation.

My daughter is a source of inspiration and I am grateful for her everyday. I will continue to reach my goals and dreams because I never want her to associate becoming a mother as being the end of a woman’s life. Much love to all! If you have any questions or just want a burlesque cheerleader, email me at evamaegarnet@gmail.com.